"Taylor Martin" (tjmartin)
07/24/2020 at 13:50 • Filed to: None
1
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"Taylor Martin" (tjmartin)
07/24/2020 at 13:50 • Filed to: None | 1
| 13 |
On saturday I’ll more than likely be huffing it up to Maryland on a much needed roadtrip, stopping at my Uncle and Aunt’s house for a night in GA before staying with my parents for a few weeks. That’s all assuming my test results come up negative, which would shock me if they did otherwise. It’s been two weeks since I was exposed to the person who was exposed to a person who had COVID, and I’ve shown no symptoms of any sort. The results will, simply put, make everyone feel better. Regardless, if they come up positive then all the mending I’ve done is for nothing.
Because there’s going to be a lot of driving involved, I wanted to check the oil and some other things (it’s recommended I change it at 79000, I’m at 77,000. However, it also recommended to change it on the 16th. It’ll be one of the first things I do when I get back), put some air in my tires, and just make sure my engine hadn’t died (which has happened before, randomly flooded for literally no reason. Smoke out the tailpipe, had to ease onto the gas to choke the engine and get it to start). But there was one other thing that needed some attention...
...my wipers. They’ve been squeaking for a while now, and were absolutely awful in these humid Florida conditions. It’s a long overdue operation, and one that I could pay anybody to do themselves... but no.
I headed over to Advanced Auto Parts to pick up a pair of 22 inch wiper blades with Rain-X technology to prove that I could do a mechanical thing, even if this is the least mechanical thing to do to your car... but shush... this is the first time I’ve done anything physical fixing to the car so this was a big deal...
It’s funny, 5 minutes away from the Advanced Auto Parts is a Discount Advanced Auto Parts... maybe I could’ve saved money cause wipers can be pricey... but I won’t need wipers for another few years so I suppose it’s a worthy investment.
The first thing to do was take off my old wipers. The instructions were thoroughly laid out on page 255 of my owners manual. There’s a latch on the top you flip open, then you yank them out. Really straightforward stuff. However, I spend 30 or so minutes looking for a latch that simply doesn’t exist before realizing these aren’t Acura wipers, but some other brand (they looked and felt pretty cheap, and were kind of falling apart. Good riddance).
There were no labels or anything, so I haven’t a clue what kinds of wipers they are or how to take them off, so I spend another 20 minutes figuring that out.
After almost breaking the drivers side wiper, I got both of them off. Hurray! I’m halfway there, which means I can sing !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .
Now, I’m sure anyone here with a mechanical eye knows that typical wipers don’t come with chewed bubble gum attached to them. Well, it’s not bubble gum, but for all intensive purposes it may as well be, it’s a funny story regardless. (I apologize for the lack of pictures. We all decided it was best to not photograph or social media that night, so I hung onto the phones).
It was back in highschool (which really wasn’t all that long ago) when my best pals and I were going to hang out and have a sleepover. Yes, guys have sleepovers too and they’re awesome. What wasn’t so awesome, at least to me, was that there would be alcohol involved. I don’t detest anyone for drinking whether they’re underaged or not, I just think it’s really really really really stupid that it’s the “cool” thing to do. This is a radical mindset for a college kid, but there you are. I think getting trashed is dumb and nothing else.
I was going to go that night and moderate, make sure nobody got absolutely hammered, and wasn’t looking forward to the miserable night ahead at all. There were a few of my pals (who I still love and hate) who I knew would be super drink happy and do shots or whatever. In short, I needed to babysit.
Well, before the drinking happened, we were hanging out in a parking lot messing around with our cars on dampened roads thanks to the light drizzling that took place that night. We skidded and swerved in an empty parking lot under the light of the streetlamps, and every so often we would ride each others cars. Climb onto them while the other person drives around at like 10mph. It’s just about the stupidest thing I’ve done in high school, which is pretty tame compared to others.
Well it’s my turn for people to ride on my TSX. One of my pals climbs onto the drivers side of the windshield and just sort of lays there. Ha ha, it’s all fun and games, until my automatic wipers go off. He thought I was trying to get him off by force when, in reality, I had no control. I panicked as he just kept climbing on my car and when he finally got off my drivers side wiper blade broke off.
I... was... livid ... I was the first person in this squad to have their own car, not a hand me down. Iris was ( and still is) my baby, but this was also the first bit of real damage done to her. And yes, I’m using “her” here because she feels like a companion, just like my pals. I was in no mood to watch as all my friends got hammered, so I drove home in the rain with only one working wiper.
Now, my parents are pretty cool, and I trust them with everything. So while all my pals were keeping the alcohol a secret, I flat out told them days before. They weren’t going to tell, we’re stupid high schoolers after all, and most importantly they trusted me and my stubbornness to keep me out of trouble. So when I get home, I tell them exactly what happened with the wiper before storming straight to bed, in no mood for dinner or anything. Meanwhile my dad, who has more knowledge of putting things together than I do, threw some putty on the wiper while I was sleeping. It’s been working perfectly (aside from the squeaking) for the past 2 years.
I wake up the next morning to a stream of texts that went something like this:
“Andrew is throwing up. He can’t stop throwing up.”
“God I’m freaking out”
“Harry had to tell his parents and they’re calling the cops”
“Andrews being rushed to the hospital”
“Holy sh* t”
Or something like that.
It wasn’t alcohol poisoning, which was good, Andrew just drank way too much (it was raspberry vodka, so go figure). Regardless, I dodged the BIGGEST bullet thanks to these crap wipers and my passion for my car. It’s one of the key moments I look back to whenever I wonder why I like cars. They’re awesome!
We laugh about it now, at least I do, and all their parents think I’m the absolute best kid in existence. They’re very jealous. Me and my parents love to laugh about that (most of them come from religious families too... guess religion and morals are a bit different, huh?)
I thought about this whole story while waiting for the 15 minutes of Florida rain to go away, but after that I got back
to getting
the new wipers on. I got so confused by the little plastic mechanism on the wiper
that I completely
took it apart just to try and figure out. The instructions and pictures weren’t exactly helpful either since the rain wet the paper and
and made the ink
run. That was a real hassle
, but after another 20 minutes the first of the two wipers snapped on
with a
very subtle and satisfying click
.
Yes, I took off the yellow protectors... I’m stupid but not that stupid...
Now that I’d finally gotten the hang of it, the second wiper went on easy. Still, a 10 minute job took about an hour thanks to my small brain, but I was greatly rewarded for my efforts. I ran the wipers dry for about 3 minutes. No issues, no dragging, and absolutely no squeaking. It was Tesla silent. A nd when I flipped on the wiper fluid, it somehow got quieter. Not only that, but my windshield looks super clean and clear. 10/10 would recommend Rain-X treated wipers .
A Very Happy “Mechanic”
Now, to dispose of the old wipers.
Since I’m heading to MD and will hopefully be able to socially distance with my pals, I decided to give the broken wiper to the guy
who actually broke it. If he didn’t want it I would’ve kept it since I’m a sentimental sucker (
!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!
) As for the other one...
I am sentimental, but I have no use for a crappy, offbrand, squeaky, unbroken wiper. It’s 22 inches, that’s big. And while it would make a fine momento to my first mechanical job, knowing that my pal is taking the other one, the more meaningful wiper, is plenty enough for me.
Besides, my car has the new wipers, which I’ll be using for the next couple of years. That’s a win in my book.
I know this is no feat of engineering, but it’s a feat to me, which begs the question what was your first mechanical feat? Did you ride solo or work with a parent? I’m curious to hear some stories of people getting excited by fixing tiny things that seem so simple now.
Take care folks.
sony1492
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 14:10 |
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Good on you for staying away from vice, sounds like your wipers have seen some things.
Tbh i wouldnt change anything about drinking in my teens, now I c ant even look at hard liquor without feeling sick. We were always around parents who knew what we were doing and made it a safe environment (house partys and otherwise). Can't imagine being around people who call the cops for that sort of behavior
TheRealBicycleBuck
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 14:29 |
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I am one of the few people who really hates RainX. In misty conditions, RainX causes the water to create microbeads which acts like fog on the windshield. At night, it causes horrendous glare and I used to do a lot of driving at night.
Once the rain picks up, the stuff works as advertised. To me, the poor performance is high-humidity/light drizzle conditions doesn’t make it worth the performance in normal rain.
Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 14:35 |
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I share your disgust for the idea of getting hammered. Why it is considered cool to act like a complete idiot I have no idea but that’s how the world works. I wouldn’t have enough patience to baby sit any drunk friends either.
I also got hopelessly confused the first time I changed my wipers. Then, it took 10 minutes every time. You’re good there. You just sort of have to puzzle it out and then you'll always know how to do it.
Svend
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 14:43 |
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I’m sorry, but you had me at:-
and every so often we would ride each others cars . Climb onto them while the other person drives around at like 10mph.
and
Well it’s my turn for people to ride on my TSX . One of my pals climbs onto the drivers side of the windshield and just sort of lays there.
Anyone, I mean anyone, climbed unto my car, it would be the last thing they ever climbed.
Wipers can be a PITA, but the newer ‘exact fit’ ones for new cars make life a little easier, if not a little more expensive, so I order mine from Jersey in the Channel Islands as they aren’t taxed.
onlytwowheels
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 17:41 |
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I pissed away (literally) a small fortune on alcohol in my younger years. I wasn’t a drunk like some of my friends, just a social drinker who went out 5 nights a week for some pool and beer. So me point in my mid- twenties I developed, which pretty much was the end of my drinking. It’s interesting how all my friends looked like idiots when I stopped drinking with them. I often wondere d why I continued to hang out with th em.
Svend and I have similar thoughts on climbing on cars. Never, never, ever would I allow this. Pride in ownership and respect for property are paramount.
Stay off the bot tle and be smooth on the throttle.
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Taylor Martin
> Svend
07/24/2020 at 18:47 |
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It’s true, their lives are in the drivers hands... I just didn’t feel like running them over. When my pal did snap the wiper I slammed on the breaks but he clung on tight, so in reality it should’ve been the last thing he climbed haha.
Wipers are a bit of a pain, but so long as they don’t give me grief the trouble was worth it.
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Taylor Martin
> Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available
07/24/2020 at 18:49 |
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Huzzah , a like minded individual on the subject of alcohol and when it comes to first time wiper changes. They really are tricky, but now I get the mechanisms a bit more and could do it again.
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Taylor Martin
> TheRealBicycleBuck
07/24/2020 at 18:50 |
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Uh oh. I hadn’t a clue Rain-X didn’t do great in humidity. The good news is when it rains here it usually pours, even in it is for 15 minutes. Light rain simply isn’t a thing in Florida. But humidity can be, so I’ll certainly complain about it if I start to notice it.
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Taylor Martin
> sony1492
07/24/2020 at 18:52 |
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It wasn’t that the cops were called because we were drinking, its that an ambulance was called and then the cops followed them. Nobody would’ve known had nobody told the parents Andrew was throwing up uncontrollably. He needed an ambulance. The cops just got involved since... well... underaged drinking.
My wipers are even wiser than I am it seems, and they’ve served me well.
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Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 18:52 |
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Considering a history of alcoholism on both sides and a gluten allergy that excludes all but very specialized beer, why bother?
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Taylor Martin
> onlytwowheels
07/24/2020 at 18:58 |
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!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
That’s the greatest phrase I’ve ever heard in my life, and now it’s more than a phrase, it’s a motto.
It’s interesting. Looking back I just thought it was fun and games. I mean, sitting on the roof of a vehicle is pretty nice (I one day hope to stargaze that way), adding the extra layer of slow, controlled movement seemed harmless enough. Though once the damage was done I had enough, so I understand the passion for vehicular preservation... my reaction is just a bit delayed is all.
That’s a fantastic song, and it’s been on my playlist since the day I bought/named the car.
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Taylor Martin
> Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available
07/24/2020 at 18:58 |
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Sounds like a hassle indeed.
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Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available
> Taylor Martin
07/24/2020 at 18:59 |
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Like am I going to go that far out of my way to take a risk that probably won't pay off? Heck no.